Getting an M-Audio Oxygen 25 keyboard to sound like a concert piano can prove to be difficult. I noticed that when recording my "Wet Wire Hooks" album last year. However, even given that difficulty alone, getting one to sound like an avant-garde “prepared piano” proves far trickier. I spent a long time fiddling with innumerable settings in Reason. I think it's turned out okay though, if you can look past the modern electronic instruments used, and their differing tones, and see the general intent, rooted in traditional 20th Century Classical experimentation; Serialism, Shaker Loops, and such.
The odd driving of that keyed under-rhythm, and that smattering of plinky-plonky mini-riffs were great fun to work out. The choral additions should be otherworldly, ominous and full of a rising passionate ire, growing more frantic – a Greek chorus, mouthing tragedy. One step closer to “going Classical”, this one. Might as well be “going Postal”, given the album's underlying themes.
I hope that this piece appeals - it's one of the best I've ever composed. The metaphorical (and, if we follow current affairs, perhaps actual) end of coherent civilization and the rising of a darker age, is about as best as I could put it. I think I am right in believing that Iberius was an ancient saint of Ireland. There are various other connotations to the title though, and quite a lot to read from them.
Narbleed: perhaps better as 'North bleed'. I was thinking of internal snowstorms at the time; a red, screaming age of settling ice and the clash of endless conflict, with all sound thought and interpersonal cohesion destroyed; the devastating onset of the Kali Yuga. A bleak, intense album. A synesthetic reflection of darkening times. I was later informed that "Narbe" is the German word for scar - a curious coincidence.
I made a new acquaintance recently from elsewhere in the music world. He's nice enough I'd say; interesting, and a relatively good musician, but he does patronize me to holy Hell. I just thought I'd save this conversation for my diary, and also at his behest as he's nigh-on ordered me to keep his words as reference. I've adjusted it slightly on my side to aid grammatical fluidity. I think I will indeed try a few of the ideas out, eventually. I don't think he took on board a single damn thing I said in this though, but it certainly gave me an excuse to wax lyrical I suppose (or rant polemic; vent spleen, etc.). It provides me with a small, quiet laugh going over his comments later on. I'm also quite pleased with how I phrased my points. It could almost be an unexpected interview, but held between two grumpy, over-opinionated bulldogs, one invariably more obtuse and pig-headed than the other. I'll leave that order for a listener to decide though.
In TTS as usual, just to mask his privacy a little, and also because my voice is routinely knackered for a myriad irritating reasons.
I am indeed sensitive. I recognize that. It goes with the artistic territory, or perhaps stimulates it in the first place. It's a royal pain in the arse. I'm not *this* far gone though. Genuine curiosities over the matter, on my part. I wasn't annoyed at all in the discussion. She went apeshit, mind. We've since made up. I can post whatever the Hell I like in my diary though, on here at least. I love my girlfriend, eventually to be wife. My God though... it's going to be interesting times. It'll be worth it, and, deep down, is a matter of some cosmic humour to me.
My NoScript currently blocks Disqus by default. Hence if you've written to me recently (i.e. over the past 6/7 months) via that, I won't see it. Just PM me if you genuinely want a chat, or email me somehow. I can cope with having my arse chewed off linguistically, though, unfortunately, do indeed respond in kind if it's inane enough. I genuinely enjoy BitChute, exponentially. I'm a little hesitant, still, with the other service though.
PS. the lazy photo-choice is me, recently. I personally call it "bigot chic". Somewhere between Ming the Merciless, Fu Manchu and Anton LaVey. Just despicably fatter (and not Evil).
Tyler Haagenson performed an exceedingly good guitar part for the original version of this song. That can be found with a little digging - this is not my main sales platform.
I thought I'd just recite it alone though, and without any distracting effects. I'm growing very tired of YouTube.
I hope this makes sense. I'm not a nihilist (or the rest). I tried to tap into the mindset though, as best I could, and illustrate some of the damning flaws, or at least what one could have to cope with, were one to accept it, and the very baseness and flippancy of that.
I think I'll lose YouTube followers for posting this; their attention primarily. Or gain more enemies. Or they just won't give a shit. Either way, and regardless, it felt like good art.
Of course, it could just be a very anal-minded and sub-standard attempt to gently troll those who have irritated me on YT recently, but I do feel the poem has some small merit on its own, even if the framing is a little confrontational and grumpy. They liked the original thrash version; I'm sure someone or other can stand the words. It's certainly not one of my best pieces, but I originally wrote it around age 17 - you do have that sort of ultra-pessimistic, self-righteous view at that age, sometimes.
I have reformatted this since. It's pretty tame stuff by comparison to the other one - there's far more I could have said - but I'm fairly happy with it. They have asked me questions, and I have answered them, to the best of my ability. If more becomes apparent, I shall add that in also. Precision is important to me, even though my responses are at length.
I no longer think it may aid my marketing, even were I to find the right places to put it. I'll store it here for my diary, as usual, and I'm still not so sure if YouTube (and its, hmm... general clientele) would like certain small parts of it. When I uploaded it on there I changed "Israel" to "that egregious, middle eastern ethno-state", for example. I hope I don't sound *too* naive (or pompous) in it. Not beyond acceptable measures. It's certainly a little world weary. For my few fans, as always, a great thank you. To anyone new, this serves as a fair, if grumpy, introduction. I'm sure it will improve - they offer the option to hone in on accurate truth; why not?
Recorded with TTS as my voice really is best saved for my dire, eccentric approximation of "singing".
Here's my Drooble site: https://drooble.com/ben.power
A "preview" poem based on excerpts from the lyrics to this new song. It'll be along in finished form in a little while - currently just working on mastering my instrumental work.
I hope the verse appeals. It's extremely grim, but has matched my current mood, and what I have been researching and educating myself on politically, and with some thorough poetic bluntness. If we can cope with Yeats and the masterpiece that is "The Second Coming", or indeed the grim excesses of Wilfred Owen et al. then I'm sure we can chew through this humble spasm of decayed words. It's a bit shit by comparison, granted, but I think it still possess some mild merit.
I based these disquieting lines on a bleak yet passionate document provided to me by "Dark Phoenix", first translating her French, and then comparing it to her original English translation. I then tried to make a composite of my own, both in augmented word choices, and also then in grammatical layout. English lends itself well to assonance, alliteration and slant-rhymes. Especially the compound slanting at the end of my longest stanza, in which I was tempted to use the word "morrow", but decided on a fiddlier concrete metaphor to try and describe breakdown and dissolution - an endzeit. I could have done the same with "dawning", but there is no ready dawn in this. not without great, wrenching darkness.
The meter came naturally to me, based around six-counts. I'd have to look up the technical term for that; that regular stress pattern laying on the first and fourth syllable. It's another obvious choice tied in to the opaque Satanic nature of these condemnatory verses...
I am not a Satanist. It all pisses me off a wee bit to be honest, the "lefty" takes on it in particular. I go with Aleksandr Dugin over the issue. If it's good enough for V. Putin, who am I to disagree, at this level? As i've noted before in places between-the-lines... I genuinely prefer Russo-Slavic Christian authoritarianism-of-sorts to some of the other bloody options out there right now. I have no doubt in my mind that my Dad would not agree with me on this in the slightest. Oh well... what a pain. I don't care much if anyone else agrees. The UK has been a very irritating places for me to live in, for quite a while. It deserves better than what it has rampantly devolved into. Anyhow, I've gloriously digressed from the point now.
The full song can be found on the new "Risen" album, by Vore Complex, whenever I pull my finger out and actually finish it.
Odd note: I have never been particularly fond of Nietzsche either. Not at all really - the ramifications of his works, usually, and the huge pile of wanky, nihilist twits following in his lunatic wake. I do read him now and again though, in places, and I think I feel a mite of pity for the man sometimes.
I framed this on my Facebook "diary" as follows:
"The link(s) are now above (and not below, as stated). You - will - get the idea though. I am fond of the musicians that I am fond of. Whom I am fond of.
As this is my real diary... I don't think I can get away with that kind of shit on here. I have genuine musician friends whom I would not wish to disrespect. Not many.
The rest of the information is speculatively true - or factually true to a mixture of recent primary source readings/listenings... yet also personal and thus speculative, in that sense.
My friend consented to his words being utilized. Here's the near-literal (spelling & grammar corrected) gist of how I explained it to him:
"do you mind if I use bits of this conversation for my personal song marketing? I have a weird, polemic idea. Certain bits could aid my new "subversive" marketing notion [on FB]. It's all utterly impersonal; I just want to utilize my own rambling rants, edited slightly and bolstered with a few post-convo ideas: basically - "this is a Qanun, listen to the link, you'll like it. Go on. Oh shit, I'm spouting more political anti-State words. But go on... you really want to hear that song instead. *Go on*. Oh well, you poor fools... you didn't take the bait. Thus, hear this!"... it's recorded in TTS at such a pace that people will naturally zone out, but there are enough contentious buzz-words to drag them back in periodically. It's basically playing chicken with the audience. I'm personally betting that (A.) they listen to the links early, or (B.) they turn it all off altogether. Just trying a new technique - experimenting on a slow Monday night..."
I don't really try too hard to market on BitChute these days. I respect this platform and its users more. Without seeming *too* arsey though... you may, in literality, enjoy the 3 tunes above far more than this fiercely polemic diary (or this rambling write-up). In which case... well, just try them out. It's all strange Electro-Industrial music, with that aforementioned live instrument. At least I've soothed my own conscience over the matter.
PS. the cover is unrelated... as per often-usual in my eccentric postings on here. It's just some spare art I created. I could have put a picture of my Qanun in, but I imagine that - given the 15 quid price - it's pretty standard. unlike this unusual JPEG.
The lyrics to this are pretty standard VC stuff - if you know my project by now, the sort of themes should be familiar. They're adapted from the words of a friend. Really though, I'm more pleased with my Qanun playing in this. It's a Zither-type stringed instrument with an "Arabic" sound. I picked it up from a guy yesterday for 15 quid. Very reasonable price. It's an amazingly fun instrument, even if I am a bit ropey at it. I'll get better with practice. I hope you enjoy this beginner effort.
Spiderwebs... spreading far out, and very deep; an abyssal depth. There's something going on at the very centre.
I literally don't know what this song is about anymore. I found the video on my PC a while back. I'd being delving into all the topics narrated some time in 2018, but experienced my second major breakdown around that point, and now no longer have any coherent or useful notes on the subject. I don't even know what the hieroglyph means, or what some of the background imagery is. I'm sure I did at one point, but the collapse hit me hard, and I carefully deleted a lot of data shortly before that time, and subsequently went mental.
All I have left is a cluster of unrelated stubs on occult pseudo-military matters:
Hexen 2039 manual (okay, it's weird fantastical art mostly, but then again, so is mine).
The alleged shock-stick experiments of Michael A Aquino & the things written in the MindWar trilogy.
The warnings of Aleksandr Dugin.
A few notes on trafficking.
An extended speculative hypothesis on the world wars, and on blood sacrifice.
Inevitably, something about nefarious goings-on in the higher echelons of society, and in the military industrial complex.
I hope I'm not too obtuse in writing this blurb. I don't want to set myself up for (too much) ridicule. I was privately exploring Ponerology - Political, or otherwise - from an amateur research perspective, and just dipping my toes into the matter. I think of some of David Icke's comments on the purpose of the Internet also. I'm not sure quite what I was thinking at the time. It's horrendous on the mind, some of this stuff.
It's a crappy little lo-fi video for a crappy little lo-fi demo, and one that i never intend to release commercially. I don't think I'll ever return to it; not in music.
Still, I hope it brings quizzical enjoyment. It certainly puzzles the Hell out of me.
I possess a basic qualification in Computer Science outside of the music zone, and slowly improved upon, on top of a few other academic qualifications. In a nutshell, I'm - quite obviously - not an expert, but I do have some impartial interest.
I don't like the term "conspiracy theorist". It's invariably applied as a pejorative, to shame people away from even *considering* these topics. You'd almost think that that was a very well-designed and thought out mechanism for thought suppression and self-censoring. Try "conspiracy evaluator" instead. See how the psychological perception almost immediately shifts. I tend to start with the idea that it's all a crock of shit. Sometimes, not always, but sometimes, I do deviate from that initial axiom though. There's where it starts to get very odd.
Oh dear... today hasn't been so great either, but better than yesterday and the day before (small "ha"). My weary mission to, in some small form, "get my own back" long-distance at the middle management, and upwards, at my local NHS department - who seem to have been heartily screwing with my chronic physical health treatment for a good few months - continues at gathering pace, as I put the finishing touches to this. I've sent it off for mastering anyway. I genuinely pity the man who performs that service for me, as he’s going to have to hear it on loudly on repeat, but I think he’s used to me by now.
Though I have tried private healthcare as well, I did used to love the British National Health Service, and the whole idea of it, with some idealism also... but I feel something has to change, and it's not the hard work of the worn-out, burnt-out, underfunded doctors and nurses, and care staff. Someone, somewhere is fecking the system up, which is a glorious pain all round. Meanwhile, just to urinate in their neat little cappuccinos for a few minutes, I hope this vicious extended moan serves a grim purpose.
I wasn't going to include this "song" online as I was a little timid as to what the reception would be. I still am, and I’ve posted it in different forms to a few places now. I have to work very slowly as I’m asleep most of the day. However, once again, they refused to put through my only ointment treatment on time, as they hadn’t even made the order due to logistics difficulties and a certain casual forgetfulness. It's not as if it's too effective at all really, but considerably better than nothing.
Just to skirt around the edges of that inadvisable nothing with as much of a sense of (ultimate) negative aesthetics as possible, I composed this, drawn from passively-recorded segments of my personal medical log diary in a few places - I primarily keep it so I have some hard evidence in case we need, unfortunately, to attempt to legally inconvenience them. As I wrote above, I don't like the NHS very much at the moment. I'm extremely bitter, in fact. I think (with whatever passes as mild hope) that I have a right to be, at least currently. I remain a very odd artist though... I like a certain harrowing realism. No, not like, but just require at the moment, for that grim near-peace of mind.
Caution: It's a horrible few minutes. This is - really - just for me though. It cheers me, in the later night, and at moments of the day when the discomfort becomes unreasonable. I don’t dare listen without headphones on. It's a rather feral smile, granted, but cheer is much better than the alternative. Sorry if you don't like it too much, but really... it's okay. It's just catharsis for me, for these few minutes, and hours, scratching along into unpleasant days. I don't particularly expect much (or any) understanding.
I do still pray. That really does help. I’d like to forgive them, in time. I don’t think I can right now though.
I'm not a very good amateur painter. I was quite pleased with this though. I think it almost looks cheerful, ostensibly at least. However, just to drop back into the usual doom and gloom, I thought I'd add in what I was actually *thinking* as I painted it. Oh dear, that's usually a mistake - I'm not a Biblical scholar, so I may have made contextual errors, but this'll give the basic gist of it. I'm afraid the letter phrase lodged in it is slightly private - so private in fact that I promptly forgot it in dismay shortly after finishing this dire work. I'm sure I'll remember again at some point though. Artists can be rather eccentric. I hope it doesn't come across as too moralizing; it's meant to be impartial, but just noticing a few things. Also, I tried not to slip into obscurantism (a hateful, pretentious practice) so kept this as short and snappy as possible. Perhaps someone will like staring at it. Sorry for the periodic colour changes, I'm still getting used to my new editing software.
I should start by sharing that I am in chronic physical pain right now, without any relief at all (if you know the "song" by Throbbing Gristle: Hamburger Lady, then this will make more sense - it's not that extreme, but it's bloody painful and unrelenting). It will, no doubt, continue for a while longer. It has continued for a good many months before this, and exponentially, hence my sporadic posting. How long could be down to the NHS. I've tried private also, but was re-referred, for financial reasons as well - the treatment plan would bankrupt me. Trouble on the horizon, we think.
Anyhow, to distract, I thought I would create what I have called on Facebook "musical Christmas cards", just to take my mind away from the constant burning discomfort of possessing no functioning skin. Dark humour often arises from adversity. It's funny to some minds, if they need it to be so. Not really to mine - though I can see what I am trying to do. I hope it's still funny. Not art. Just funny, to darkened minds. Don't think about it too much.
I remain a Roman Catholic though. I pray to God, and very regularly, during the night (and morning). That's quite private though. I know that's not a popular view nowadays; but it's okay.
Jesus wept... this is a weird exposition, just for one rubbish vid. I had written more for this entry a few days back but the temporary recurring fever has broken for another three days or so, and I just cannot be bothered to complain any more.
Image mainly unrelated, just some therapeutic muck.
A small segment of the much longer poem that I decided to focus in on and "remix". The lyrics to it all were originally written in late 2013. It took me a good few years to sort the music (and my voice) out though. The original was initially part of my Skomorokh project, till I incorporated that into Vore Complex itself.
The video is, once again, just me testing out various combinations of effects for my future reference. As for the music, it's a very grim, bitter topic for a song at all. Most of mine are, albeit not always this linguistically visceral. Sardonic, but without any real humour, bar the blunt, irreverent phrasing. A few weirdly understated British-themed reflections on Establishment ruling class atrocity and the trickle-down into (or overlap with) the hardcore fetish communities.
The screen glitches and other visual aberration parts are deliberate, don't worry. I was trying to create an analogy to a camera malfunctioning and switching off, as an issue gets increasingly more complicated, and then eventually just dying away unreported. The unsettling backing image is just an adjusted piece of macabre art based on a pair of human lips, dripping bloody saliva.
The rest of the album it's from is mainly compromised of near-equally sardonic world observations and (very) black humour biographical moments from my own life.
If you'd like to try it out, it's here: https://vorecomplexself-released.bandcamp.com/album/skomorokh
A short, deranged music video I constructed to play with and test out what a few different effects and filters could be used for in one of my video editing programs. The song's based on one taken from my BFTS album "Skinpick". The original is still rather odd, but is considerably tamer in pace. I had great fun constructing this weird entertainment. Try the rest out of you like: https://bleachforthestars.bandcamp.com/album/skinpick
An album commissioned by and written for my good friend. Here's one of the demo tracks. This is an early work-in-progress. It'll all be done though, when it's ready. For the rest of my VC work, both solo material and collaborations, go here: https://vorecomplexself-released.bandcamp.com/
A preview of my upcoming Bleach For the Stars album. It'll be ready in two weeks; just under, hopefully.
Here's the blurb for the album:
"My previous albums in this series, "Ribtrain" and "Narbleed" covered one developing aspect of apocalyptic musical fiction. "Out Of The Sea" draws back a little from that bleak mythological Dark Age, and from those grim allusions to the conflicts of the early 20th Century, and instead delves into real-world Christian eschatology. It adopts a similar sonic template of linked, allusive motifs and semi-abstract narrative devices, but slides it out sideways, into another realm of emotive postmodern horror - or horror at the postmodern existing at all. Perhaps it's more relevant. Inspiration for this album comes from the New Testament Book of Revelation and from the writings and speeches of Aleksandr Dugin on the coming of a world-wide, Globalist "Antichrist Regime", a pitiless, tyrannical cabal of Evil that places usurpation on the semantic core of what it means to be human at all."
A link to the rest of my "demo" material: https://bleachforthestars.bandcamp.com/album/out-of-the-sea
Note: unrelated cover, as per usual; just cryptically plugging an upcoming Bleach For The Stars album.
I wrote a hideous, puerile, degenerate book a while back. I'm not proud of it, so much so that I've disowned it, withdrawn it from the market, and attempt these days to distance myself from it. No easy task - I estimate that, at most, 8 or so people own it. That's too many. There's no defence for it really. As explanation, I can only add that I considered myself a liberal at that point, and was trying too hard to be progressive, both in with the crowd, and also out to one side, both pretentious and obnoxious, all safe, brain-dead -ists and -isms and desperate to be on what I had erring into thinking was "the right team", and despite some very bizarre essays. Most of it is made up, and near-all of it is gratuitous rubbish. I have since matured a little, and come to my senses, thankfully. I was never a leftist, that's my small recompense. These days I try to follow a traditional lifestyle, with a large family, and a mild yet satisfying sense of infuriating lunacy at the raising of five joyously irascible children.
That said, I'm still a professional artist, a wearily-published poet, a benighted amateur writer and a very odd musician, estranged from a record company I despise. I'd genuinely rather be a postman. We're getting there...
This is only of only three "articles" in that wretched tract that I still actively enjoy, and have a little nostalgia for. An abstract semi-Surreal lampooning of the various academic textbooks I was reading on my university course at the time, as much as those wonderful "joy of learning"-style yearly compendiums I was given as a small child; stuffed with strange and fantastical information - not much of which was too helpful to me later on bar implanting a sense of awe at a very curious world.
I've included a few more written thoughts at the end of this video. It's probably best to just attempt to watch it though. Not exactly high-brow content, but it occupied me thoroughly one evening in a hotel room. I take full blame for the atrocious backing-music. I've always been fond of a certain synesthetic link.
I have a few versions of this track floating about now. This is the latest, and, from a musical perspective, the most accessible (and perhaps best).
I know the barest, most basic rudiments about MK-Ultra and its ramifications, and those of all the other programs I am familiar with, and no more; much less sometimes. It made for an interesting track though. A lot of pieces of paper hastily picked up since the official end of the experiment, one thinks.
I'm very glad that Ed has no idea (or interest) regarding the context and contents of this song. It would really not do him good to hear more on the topics - that's not me intending to be patronizing. He plays a damn good guitar on it though - and recorded raw in a 1st and only take, as we always do. He's a great musician. I just do whatever with the rest.
This album concerns itself in general with human-on-human experimentation and the machinations of those who would see humans as cattle (or play objects), and the sorts of degenerate individuals (etc.?) who might be caught carrying such out. It goes down to very dark levels of anecdotal & factual atrocity, in places. There's meant to be an unsettling 'endzeit' current running through the context of it though; a true apocalyptic theme, hence why a lot of the chorus words add up to '33' or '333' combinations, either in the words' layouts themselves or in their repetitions. A reflection, bitterly, on true Evil, but - with hope - not a participant in it. It's an album promoting and siding for Order, but composed to draw the conclusions from deep Chaos.
I hope someone enjoys it. Buy it if you like - it would help us out. Otherwise, listening actively is fine also. Cheers: https://vorecomplexself-released.bandcamp.com/album/a-stranger-breed
After hearing "A Similar Song", which I had, primarily, recorded with my youngest stepson a few days previous, my eldest stepdaughter, Liberty, asked if she could have a go on her own. I was pleased by this enthusiastic request, and so asked her to go away and write some lyrics (making sure she employed coherent rhyme this time; my eternal bugbear, the way the local state school teaches them 'poetry' or 'lyrics' - lazy all round, and hideously postmodern on their parts). Then we recorded this little piece. I was so pleased with her contribution that I added it to my last 'proper' VC solo album, "Fires Fly". She really did record the creepy synth tones to this track, playing them on my Oxygen 25 keyboard. I just organized them to sync a little in my sequencer, and then added my own rancid voice, and some minimalist beat patterns. Her keyboard playing is not too distant from mine, and still, her voice is far better.
Liberty had quite a 'dark' concept already in mind, for an innocent preadolescent lyricist. I liked that - it seemed pleasantly irreverent, bordering on heresy to some insipid pedagogic eyes. It's good to set the catoblepas there among the pigeons, though, as I occasionally say to myself. However, I thought I'd boost it up to my own general adult standard of conceptual 'darkness'. I used my parental discretion in advising her what I was going on about in my own extension on her concept. She is not old enough to be informed over some of the references.
Incidentally, I'm okay with 'dark'. When that becomes truly dark, I draw the line. My music reflects on atrocity, and thoroughly at times. It does not condone it. In a nutshell, I had learned more harrowing information from a valuable YouTuber I follow (and view on here also). The existence of a Planned Parenthood building in Silicon Valley, directly across the street from a company designing real, synthetically-cultured 'meat' products, presumably for the Vegetarian or Vegan markets, was an odd coincidence. I had wanted to play up the inevitable 'Soylent Green' comparisons angle a little, so did, in horrifying fashion. Perhaps it's not a coincidence - but it would be libel on my part to speculate too far, as the original commentator had indeed noted. I hope they don't mind (too much) that I sampled a few seconds of their speech. I thank them for their hard investigative work.
So here we are, one more odd song for the pile. If you like it - or at least, appreciate it; it's not really a topic for casual enjoyment - it's available (along with the rest) on this digital album: https://vorecomplexself-released.bandcamp.com/album/fires-fly
If not, well, doesn't matter. It'll remain a fond memory for me, and good time spent together. I'll be writing more with her in the future, as and when she wants to.
Note: the (probably unrelated) photo is of a toy unicorn recently purchased by my other half and brought into this house. In the space of less than three days, the horn has been wrenched off, and its throat appears to have been vigorously slit. I noticed it lying there forlornly in the bathroom yesterday. I'd love to say that this was a marvelous informed-decision on the children's part; a coordinated attempt to resist the proposed agenda of that insidious latter-day PSYOP in British toy-making. I think it's just an example of flippant childhood mass-destructiveness though. Hence why I like to keep them busy, individually, where possible.
This was written on a whim, following a few days of conversation with family i.e. Abby, and her children. I haven't run this past my elderly dad or mum; they'd have better things to do. If you like it enough to buy it, it's included with 10 other songs (I removed the wretched :Wumpscut: cover version as it was annoying me - "Wreath of Barbs" has been covered, or at least remixed by others, far too much, albeit not quite as hideously as I made it into by approximate ear) on my VC album "Fires Fly", a real attempt at honest, meaningful 'Endzeit Electronics'... or just old-fashioned electronic Industrial music, for simplicity's sake. I write concept albums, and thus don't offer single-song downloads. Try it out though, if it seems interesting: https://vorecomplexself-released.bandcamp.com/album/fires-fly
Anyhow, here's the extended gist of how I described it to the fickle, disinterested Facebook crowds. It's a musing on my part, and goes on a while. Ignore it and just listen to the music if you prefer:
"Note: It's a critical audio piece (I can’t wholeheartedly say 'song') on the progressive Marxist teaching methods that are commonly found in state-run schools - my stepchildren's schools as a prime example. It's often odd what gets thoroughly banged into their heads i.e. "Nazism was so very bad in the 20th Century, and alone caused 6 million deaths, or more, and so much more badness. The Nazis were evil incarnate. Rather like Trump. End of modern History lessons for the next 10 years. Now back to The Romans…", and what is strangely absent from their education, or at least seriously downplayed.
My stepson is very quick to point out that Nazism was evil, and Nazis are the worst people ever, but does not seem to know why that could be. At least he has not been listening too attentively to his tutors. That may save him in future times. I hope so - I think I shall continue my efforts to deprogram him, but it's not straightforward given the constant pressures off the state, and from ignorant peers. I don't want a developing nest of 'NPC' Social Justice drones.
A bitter pill beyond humour, but not outside of music, or art. None of my stepchildren knew what Marxism (Communism even, or at least Leninism.... and on down into the near synonymous cultural abyss) was, or just what atrocities were carried out in its name. I was disappointed at that, but not surprised. I did attempt to bring up the Holodomor (and indeed The Great Leap Forward), and a couple of other examples... but no. "The Nazis" owned, in totality, the evil of the previous hundred years. I am informed that enthusiastically, even if not quite told quite what happened. It's not, at all, my stepchildren's fault. I think we'll be at this a good while yet.
I should say, I don't think all of the UK state schooling is rubbish, or dangerous - the STEM areas seem mercifully untouched, bar some ideological possession regarding "(man-made) climate change". i don't know what other departments teach them at this age - and may be dismayed a little more, I think, upon finding that out. Beyond the microcosm of our daily environments, I am quite well aware of modern state-teaching paradigms, both in the UK, and also the USA. It's incredibly infuriating when the penny drops.
This song is intended as a vengeful satirical reflection on these absurdities, and, beyond that, the blatantly cynical lies & cover-ups present in our current government-funded (and from where?) child indoctrination system. I don't think the staff would acknowledge such. They could never own it; the rot runs too deep, and has been present for too many decades. I am, I think, too old to receive a detention though, which is somehow lucky. One's never entirely sure though, given the state of the UK"
PS. the photo is not one taken by me. I've used it before, for a similar video-song on Trump Derangement Syndrome. As far as I can ascertain, it is genuine, and of a Maoist-instigated famine victim. I'd be open for corrections though. You get the gist of my track by now though.
I've shared out (and written about) the song version of this piece further down my page. I won't repeat myself too much - key themes: Paul Weston vs. Antifa; Solzhenitsyn; hypocrisy; ignorance of history.
I hope this spoken-word version appeals more. Even I have gone 'off' my vocal style with Vore Complex.
The repeated mini-images are ones I wish I could have posted on Facebook much earlier in the year. They were constructed from some very unpleasant photographs I acquired. I hope it's not 'jumping the shark' to include them now. "Nothing Will Come" is one of my more proficient tracks musically; perhaps even quite moving (if I'm lucky). The vocal samples included do not beat about the bush though. If you'd like to know more about this, the song's located underneath. I don't expect you - anyone - to buy it; not on one song alone. It's part of my "Fires Fly" album, from the point where I threw in the towel musically. Either way, you can listen for free (a few times) here:
I was bitter earlier. I wrote: "The rest can burn. You'd - I'd - often hope that they would. Having observed (with shame) that also though... it would be too painless, after a definite while, and too polite".
The people I knew who suffered, and then, in a very final way, didn't suffer... I hope they Rest in Peace.
Burnout among psychiatric staff - I can't wholesomely use the term "professionals" anymore, not without grim distaste - seems ever-prevalent. That, and the fact that those above don't employ the right people for the job. IQ levels most definitely wanting, in some cases, and in others, merely a grim, Sadistic need to make up for their Psychology degree study failings. There would be other reasons why they should not have been employed, very rarely, but slipped through the net.
I'm lucky. I was just a patient. A long time ago, but sometimes it lingers. Glad I got this out in voice. As before, I hope you like it for the art. The content cannot really be enjoyed.
I wrote a huge, rambling, fiercely speculative (or imaginative/over-imaginative) diary entry yesterday regarding some horrendously bleak topics (also as a mild apology to Mr Orman Virsel for slandering him a while back in immature annoyance). This fell sprawl of morbid eccentric words didn't go down too well though - as someone sensible could almost have expected - so I scrapped it all, and thought, instead, I might just put up the musical backing, for curiosity's sake, and for anyone who likes odd songs.
I get night-terrors - no wretched wonder, you'd think, after semi-regularly browsing all this hellish material in a benighted attempt to educate myself a little on ponerology, in an amateur capacity. But no.. that's not usually why I get them. Others annoying matters from the past. Anyhow, this song was written to keep my personal horror at arm's length for a little bit, and to kill some time when decent sleep was not forthcoming. I hope you like it.
It's a remix, obviously. The original's been done to death by me, so I thought I might change the angle slightly.
The harsh, cold, beautiful sounds of a well-hidden 90s German industrial solo-act remixed into the 21st Century, and now fully mastered by J.Stillings of Steel Hook Prostheses. I have tried my hardest to maintain the original atmospheres and aesthetics of this unique, highly creative project whilst adding to the sound with my own interpretations of these classic tracks. I hope you enjoy the music. The digital album is available here, with digipak CD links to follow soon: https://throbberstalk.bandcamp.com/album/petrichor
An affectedly self-deprecatory tone for sardonic amusement - I don't dislike my own art to that degree. Otherwise, I'm merely *quite* pleased with how this turned out. The piano accompaniment I wrote - though not initially with this in mind - is certainly greater art. I thought they might work well in contrast though, with a little grumpy commentary grasping elements of both and running with them. Here's the full album version of Griefseat. Enjoy at your peril: https://bleachforthestars.bandcamp.com/album/griefseat
And oh yes, here's the (indubitably) less-accessible musical content: https://bleachforthestars.bandcamp.com/album/worm-cast
Created 1 year, 1 month ago.
I hope you like the content: rather unusual music efforts, in the majority. Well, perhaps closer to a vast, wretched load of pitch black, if poetic, moaning. Usually with a horror theme, but in a severe, realistic setting. Some significant nods to political and cultural issues also. Occasionally I'll display my acrylics paintings, but apart from that, most of the little display graphics are pieces of my macabre digital art.
Here's my business email address though: [email protected]
Thank you to all for your patience, it will not be an easy view (I would imagine), though may be rewarding to some.
PPS. I write too much music. Permutations of apocalyptic Industrial, usually. Here's the main 'hub', as such. You can expand from there. There's really a great deal more: https://vorecomplexself-released.bandcamp.com/
I have a musical side-project called Bleach For The Stars, also found on Bandcamp. That proves to be both louder, and quieter, more serious and raw, and more contained and abstract, and often at the same time. It's quite hard to pin down.