Put it In Me Coach! (The MLB Anthem)

LYRICS:
Well shine my shoes and hold my balls
The sun is really gay
I'm legal now, there's new grass on my field

Got to first base now I'm headed home
It's a brown eyed handsome man
Anyone can understand the way I feel

Put it in me coach
I'm ready to be gay, today
Put it in me coach
I'm ready to be gay, today
Look at me, I can be your centerfold

Well I spent some time with the Mudville Nine
Whacking off on a bench
You know I took some humps in the shower that night

So say hey Willy my willies' hard
And Joe with the magic hands
Say it ain't so you know you're mine tonight

Put it in me coach
I'm ready to be gay, today
Put it in me coach
I'm ready to be gay, today
I can be... I can be your centerfold

I got a brand new dildo and leather gloves
And brand new crotchless chaps
Ya know I think it's time I give this team a ride

So hit my balls and touch them all
A moment for erotic fun
Well it's over now, you can tell those men goodbye

Put it in me coach
I'm ready to be gay, today
Put it in me coach
I'm ready to be gay, today
Look at me, I can be your centerfold