Life Of Learning

A hard bargainer will stick to his or her position tenaciously to show they can not be pushed around. But in so doing they may escalate the tension between both parties, not reach an agreement and cause serious rifts to the relationship. On the other hand, a soft bargainer will make concessions readily to reach a deal quickly. However, this undermines their autonomy, and they are in danger of being bullied or taken advantage of.

So should one be a hard bargainer or a soft bargainer? Or is there a place in between? If so, where?

What if we ask a different set of questions entirely? Is there a better way of negotiating than positional bargaining? The answer to that is yes, there is. It is called Principled Negotiation.

Article Link "The Art Of Principled Negotiation" https://medium.com/@justus_71245/the-art-of-principled-negotiation-a776d52eed99?source=friends_link&sk=eae656c98e12de78d4765b51467e495e

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I've been enjoying some great conversations with families over the past few weeks. One of these conversations was on the topic of rewards. It is a fascinating topic and many people still see the use of rewards as something that is a valuable tool in interacting with others. But is it really? Can we justify using rewards?

After a Facebook post from a friend caught my eye regarding homeschooling, I was rather intrigued by the response of a teacher who argued that teachers were the best at teaching your children because after all, they are the experts. And "a trained and qualified professional is always going to do a better job than even the most well-intentioned amateur. That maxim holds true for haircuts, home electrical work, orthodontics, cardiac surgery, and education."

Sure, a baker is an expert at baking cakes, loaves of bread, etc. and a barber is an expert at cutting hair. But what are teachers actually experts at? If you just heard that someone was a teacher and that’s all you knew what does this mean they are a specialist at? What do we mean by the phrase, "Teachers are experts at teaching"? Does it even make any sense?

Does having the title of "teacher" actually mean you are an expert?

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Chores... it seems to be one of the biggest concerns of many parents.
Should you make children do chores or not?
Isn't it "good for them"?

Check out the video I mention in this podcast here:
https://youtu.be/N2YRso_DKo8
https://www.bitchute.com/video/0HgBpZmNwVoK/
I also reference the book Raising Competent Children by Jesper Juul.

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The article titled "Reasons Today's Kids Are Bored, Entitled, Impatient With Few Real Friends" has been shared on Facebook more than 3.6 Million times! I have seen it shared by parents, teachers and others. It seems to be one of the most popular parenting articles around the internet these days.

So I decided to take a look...
I found myself mumbling comments to myself as I was reading and then I thought, "why not speak my thoughts out loud in front of a camera?"
So here's me dissecting the good and the bad from this article.

https://deeprootsathome.com/kids-bored-entitled/?fbclid=IwAR0VzvVWgV2s9iFMPr11hauPLQEgbucRzMmmPpCkoZwa889xJCHhIq3kAVo

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Well, I'm back for the year. After a bit of a break on holidays, I'm back to planning some projects and back to making podcasts and videos. I'm also getting back into my books and there's plenty of thoughts and ideas starting to flow. In particular, I'm back to reading more of the book 'Ultralearning' by Scott Young.

This is episode is about free recall and how I am trying it in my own life.

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In a recent book that I read called, "The Orchid And The Dandelion", the author Dr. Thomas Boyce points out that in classrooms where teachers take a more egalitarian approach the detrimental effects of dominance hierarchies can be diminished on sensitive children in particular.

But is egalitarianism the best alternative to dominance hierarchies? Are hierarchies all bad?

I introduce the idea of voluntary hierarchies.

(To read my review/summary of the book mentioned see here: https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/understanding-sensitive-and-resilient-children-f900ba5aea60?source=friends_link&sk=a64fbac0a55f9aec3c543865e0d84dc8

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The central proposition of the book “The Orchid And The Dandelion: Why some people struggle and how all can thrive”, is that people, and children in particular, have different sensitivities. Through a variety of research experiments by Dr Thomas Boyce and his team, children were plotted on a spectrum of highly sensitive children to highly resilient children. Most children fell into the resilient category. They were named the ‘dandelion’ children, as they had only mild reactions to the stresses that they were exposed to in the experiments. But some children were what Boyce called ‘orchid’ children. These children were highly reactive to the minor stresses in the tests.

Things became interesting when Boyce dug deeper into the lives of orchid and dandelion children. He noticed that orchid children were overrepresented amongst those children most susceptible to a variety of illnesses, bullying and several other adverse outcomes in the period studied. However, he also discovered that some orchid children were the most healthy children in the entire study group.

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A straw-man is an intentionally weak summarisation of an opponents argument so that it can be easily knocked down, hence straw-man.

The opposite of a straw-man is a steel-man.

You can achieve a steel-man by listening, without interruption, to your opponent’s complete argument. You then restate their argument as faithfully and as strongly as you possibly can.

This is my attempt to steel-man what seems to be the best and most current "abortion is not wrong" position and then seek to give my thoughts on these arguments.

This podcast is a continuation of my previous podcast on the dehumanisation of children. See https://anchor.fm/justus-frank/episodes/How-We-Dehumanise-Children-Ep-29-e96oam

For the debate referenced between Matt Dillahunty and Kristine Kruszelnicki see: https://youtu.be/PCg8Kb2qpg0

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There is a common idea that children have not reached full 'human-hood' yet and this seems to foster the way we dehumanise children.

Humans have sought to dehumanise other humans in the past whether in times of war (e.g. the way that nazis thought about jews) or in slavery which has occurred globally and throughout human history.

Is it fair to say that there are many parallels in our current attitudes towards children when compared to the attitudes in past regarding slaves?

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I came across a neat little podcast series called "How To Raise A Parent" which is all about the surprising life skills our kids can teach us and the importance of staying connected to the innocence of childhood.

The second episode regarding the creativity of children contained some particularly meaningful thoughts and ideas.

Listen to the podcast series here: http://partners.slate.com/how-to-raise-a-parent-podcast/p/1

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"People like to base things on language because you can manipulate the hell out of language... But you can’t manipulate reality..."

"The only thing that matters is the integrity of our actions...The integrity you embody"
"That freedom [which you embody] will either attract people or it will anger people. It will do nothing in between. But if it attracts them they will come to you and ask; how did you..."

I've made quite a few podcasts on the limitations of language and this podcast seeks to explore this topic further.

Resources:

The Voluntary Life https://thevoluntarylife.com/

How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World: A Handbook for Personal Liberty

by Harry Browne https://www.amazon.com/How-Found-Freedom-Unfree-World/dp/0965603679

The Limitations Of Language https://anchor.fm/justus-frank/episodes/The-Limitations-Of-Language-Ep-21-e919m9

Living Free in an Unfree World: Stefan Molyneux at Libertopia 2010 https://youtu.be/OLSkhR-ve8s

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Just finished listening to a neat little audiobook by William Finnegan called "Climbing With Mollie". It's a beautiful story of a father's journey into letting go of forcing his daughter to do what he thought she should be doing and instead joining her in her self-discovered talent for climbing. The effect this had on their relationship holds a good few lessons on the types of deeper relationships that adults and children can have to foster real learning and personal growth.

It's currently a free audiobook if you are an audible member. https://www.audible.com/pd/Climbing-with-Mollie-Audiobook/B07YXCPNX4

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The young lady from Nepal neither enjoyed her job nor living in Christchurch. Yet she wanted to go through with it anyway because she wants to get residency. But I was curious to find out why this would be important, why was it important to struggle through things you don't want to do?

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Had an interesting conversation with a young man who wanted to study film-making. But only after he had done another year of high-school. When I asked him if he had made any films yet, even amateur films he said, "No".

But should we really need to wait before we start pursuing those things we really want to do?

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Language becomes more useful, the more shared meaning we have. The more you and I both have a common understanding of a word, the more valuable the word becomes.

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"Human language is local and changeable, and is therefore incapable of being used as the means of unchangeable and universal information." -Thomas Paine in "The Age Of Reason"

What are the limitations of language? Back in Thomas Paine's time schooling often focused on learning the languages of Greek and Latin. But this tendency for humans to quibble about the definitions of words, particularly those spoken a long time ago, often takes away our attention from real knowledge. Language is simply a tool to pass on knowledge, so should our focus be on the tool or should it rather be on the product from using the tool?

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Back in 1794, Thomas Paine wrote the book, "The Age Of Reason".

One of the most interesting parts in this book for me was his discussion of the concept of "revelation".

Is personal revelation a valid thing to bring to a conversation?

(pardon the sound of rain on the roof)

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“The person who says he knows what he thinks but cannot express it usually does not know what he thinks.”
— Mortimer Adler

In this podcast I attempt to bring a number of ideas together.

The idea that in order to reach a pleasurable state of flow we should be creating something. That one of the most powerful ways of learning is to explain something in simple language (The Feynman technique). That reflection makes us more productive in the long term.
References:

Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/335736

https://fs.blog/2012/04/feynman-technique/

https://hbr.org/2017/03/why-you-should-make-time-for-self-reflection-even-if-you-hate-doing-it

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Is being offended a valid way to respond to criticism?

When we receive criticism we are still responsible for our reactions and emotions. Is there a better way to respond to criticism rather than to claim that you are offended?

What does it mean to be assertive? Where should we draw our boundaries? Should we draw boundaries around others or around ourselves?

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Street Epistemology is a wonderful way of engaging with others in conversations about beliefs. It seeks to explore what we believe, why we believe it, and most importantly how did we come to believe our belief is true. There are many wonderful videos online of people using this method of dialogue which I would invite you to watch.
Peter Boghossian coined the term 'Street Epistemology' in his book 'A Manual for Creating Atheists'. This is quite a wild ride of a book as on one hand Peter Boghossian advocates for using open, honest and reasoned dialogue but, as the title of the book suggests, this is mixed with a rather evangelistic zeal to "disabuse" people from their faith that turns rather authoritarian and manipulative as he thinks about society as a whole.
I discuss this fascinating example of contradiction and hypocrisy and what it tells us about how human inclinations for control.
For some wonderful examples of Street Epistemology view:
Street Epistemology: Maritza (1) | Truth Valuation (Co-ed Demands the Truth) https://youtu.be/CmFyiLICAa8
Street Epistemology: Maritza (2) | Co-ed Demands Evidence (Evidential Consistency) https://youtu.be/v9utXKpFxCo

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"Management isn’t the solution; it’s the problem.
Perhaps it’s time to toss the very word “management” onto the linguistic ash heap alongside “icebox” and “horseless
carriage.” This era doesn’t call for better management. It calls for a renaissance of self-direction." from the book "Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us." by Daniel H. Pink

Also referenced: Free To Learn by Peter Gray

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The urbanisation rate is slowing down around the world. But happens when we live closer together and are more connected than ever?

I look at the mouse utopia experiments and what they can teach us about an excess of connection versus personal connections.

References:
Mouse Utopia Experiments https://youtu.be/iOFveSUmh9U
So... MEN Are Crazy? Well This is Why by Alexander Grace https://youtu.be/B4nbaM_nkms

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Last night I was invited by a friend to attend the Ao Tawhiti senior graduation, a school here in Christchurch that does things quite a bit differently. It was a lovely event to enjoy as I heard all the exciting pathways that these students explored over their years at the school.

In this podcast, I note my observations regarding no prizes, not presuming that students will go on to university, graduation from school is not age-specific, and hugs.

Check out: https://aotawhiti.school.nz/

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Created 3 months, 3 weeks ago.

26 videos

CategoryPeople & Family

My journey in discovering the principles behind how human beings learn and my adventures in applying these to my life.